The feeling of steadfast love and support. A warm smile and a sweet tone. A joy for life and a curiosity for learning. Laughing. Laughing.
Why we need poetry to survive
The poet Mary Oliver passed this week. She visited me many times in my life. In the quiet moments I hold so dear, she made me feel less lost in my journey. Her words gave me hope that this great experience called life is truly just that - great - and not some meaningless consumption of resources and emotions.
Mary held true to her calling and embraced her journey. I admire her bravery to be a poet; to taste her daily experiences and distill her observations; to hold dear the things that many of us don't stop to digest and define for ourselves.
I aspire to live life with the same fervor. At my best, life feels poetic: not perfect but beautiful in the way it unfolds. Potentially half way through my days, at times feel as if I have failed. Lately though, I've been wrapping myself in a blanket of love; trying to make peace with my past and stepping toward each a new day as an adventure. My 43rd wish is to meet my yearnings, my sadness and joy, with open arms.
Don’t Hesitate
Mary held true to her calling and embraced her journey. I admire her bravery to be a poet; to taste her daily experiences and distill her observations; to hold dear the things that many of us don't stop to digest and define for ourselves.
I aspire to live life with the same fervor. At my best, life feels poetic: not perfect but beautiful in the way it unfolds. Potentially half way through my days, at times feel as if I have failed. Lately though, I've been wrapping myself in a blanket of love; trying to make peace with my past and stepping toward each a new day as an adventure. My 43rd wish is to meet my yearnings, my sadness and joy, with open arms.
Don’t Hesitate
If you suddenly and unexpectedly feel joy,
don’t hesitate. Give in to it. There are plenty
of lives and whole towns destroyed or about
to be. We are not wise, and not very often
kind. And much can never be redeemed.
Still, life has some possibility left. Perhaps this
is its way of fighting back, that sometimes
something happens better than all the riches
or power in the world. It could be anything,
but very likely you notice it in the instant
when love begins. Anyway, that’s often the
case. Anyway, whatever it is, don’t be afraid
of its plenty. Joy is not made to be a crumb.
don’t hesitate. Give in to it. There are plenty
of lives and whole towns destroyed or about
to be. We are not wise, and not very often
kind. And much can never be redeemed.
Still, life has some possibility left. Perhaps this
is its way of fighting back, that sometimes
something happens better than all the riches
or power in the world. It could be anything,
but very likely you notice it in the instant
when love begins. Anyway, that’s often the
case. Anyway, whatever it is, don’t be afraid
of its plenty. Joy is not made to be a crumb.
–Mary Oliver
2018 Reads
Deep Thoughts 3.0, Chapter 2
Mom, have you ever traveled to another planet?
He's eery, like a catfish.
Misunderstood lyrics:
Take me to Dutch showers like dog in the side of the light.
I can tell you my secrets so you can shop in the night.
I believe my destiny was two firths and maybe a right.(Hozier - Take me to Church)
Honeydew; couldn't escape if I wanted to. (ABBA - Waterloo)
Can't Find My Way Home
In that moment, my choice meant accepting what would never be and being someone who could let my mother delight in her reality even if it wasn't mine. I felt at peace. I knew too that the hurt will come back to me again. Followed by the choice to feel it, breathe it out and move on.
Read moreDeep Thoughts 3.0, chapter 1
I no longer have a toddler. Sorry to realize I haven't captured half the funny things both girls have said to me in their innocent observations. Still, things come up in conversation that are delightfully naive. Version 3.0 captures the braintrust of both my hearts as they navigate this big world.
Can you pause the book?
I'm reading the book... It's me... There's no "pausing"...
Yeah. Pause the book. I want to go look at that bug.
I wish we could hear dogs words so we could hear them.
Now THAT was a fart! (self congratulatory)
I can see that your hands are ticklish.
(and they're going to tickle you.)
I'm not scared of anything but monsters. Because they could be alive, like water snakes.
They guessed my favorite color was blue. And then Story guessed it was Turquoise but then I told them it was aquamagreen.
Misunderstood lyrics
Ooh Woo, I'm a rebel with a kickstand. (Portugal. The man)
We made this city all over the world. (Starship)
Can you pause the book?I'm reading the book... It's me... There's no "pausing"...
Yeah. Pause the book. I want to go look at that bug.
I wish we could hear dogs words so we could hear them.
Now THAT was a fart! (self congratulatory)
I can see that your hands are ticklish.
(and they're going to tickle you.)
I'm not scared of anything but monsters. Because they could be alive, like water snakes.
They guessed my favorite color was blue. And then Story guessed it was Turquoise but then I told them it was aquamagreen.
Misunderstood lyrics
Ooh Woo, I'm a rebel with a kickstand. (Portugal. The man)
We made this city all over the world. (Starship)
Remembering you, friend.
Today and every day.
The movement of time
Long ago.
It was taken from you: the hopefulness, the joy.
You became a warrior too soon.
Different groups and still no one felt like home.
Armor.
To protect you from deep hurt. Deeper rage.
Alone.
Because it was safe and easy.
Lost.
In your expectation of what should be happening and what is the truth.
Immobilized.
From how to move forward with your head up high.
Now.
Learning to open your heart to the moment.
to the possibilities.
to the people.
It was taken from you: the hopefulness, the joy.
You became a warrior too soon.
Different groups and still no one felt like home.
Armor.
To protect you from deep hurt. Deeper rage.
Alone.
Because it was safe and easy.
Lost.
In your expectation of what should be happening and what is the truth.
Immobilized.
From how to move forward with your head up high.
Now.
Learning to open your heart to the moment.
to the possibilities.
to the people.
Deep Thoughts 2.0, chapter 3
No... it's from a store... called... Lipstick.
It's not my forte.
It's not my fart day either.
(Because we found ourselves at a Latin Mass Sunday morning - long story - and I had to answer a lot of questions):
Why is Jesus on that cross? Brutal.
So Jesus died? Yes. And when's he coming back? Technically he already did. I didn't see him come back. Well no not here today. I mean, they think here today, but like physically not here today...
Why did Jesus need fairy seeds? No, he needed the Philases (or however they spell it).
What are they eating? The body of... ugh! Little tiny pieces of cracker.