Christmas Eve to me feels like what most people feel about Christmas Day. As a child so much happened on Christmas Eve: my family decorated our Christmas tree, we ate fondue and went to midnight mass, and opened all our gifts late into the might. Then of course, Santa would come and would hang magical silvery tinsel on our tree so when you woke up the next day, it seemed to glow.
Christmas Day was much more mellow and low key. We had a big turkey dinner usually but otherwise, everyone was on their own outside opening stockings. As I got older, I remember going to see a movie on Christmas Day a few years, just to do something.
So I get excited on Christmas Eve. I feel like it's the true finish line to this crazy season. Today felt like the first time I was truly missing something because of the pandemic. I don't honestly know how I made it this long not thinking too much about it all, but today we opted out of a gathering as my sisters and that sucked. It just felt eery in a way, low, like something wasn't right. I found myself mustering my own joy and trying to fit the down mood. We went for a drive just to get out of the house and played along the frozen river in Deckers; we even got to see a eagle fly by. Moods greatly increased on the way back and I got to take Willy for a quick walk, including a run on the golf course so he could flush out all the geese hanging out - that might have been one of the best gifts of the day. I think we did okay. The girls benefitted from opening a few gifts to break up the day. We sat and had wine and cider by the fire out back.
Tomorrow will be filled with much more energy, at least in the morning. I'm now dozy and off to sleep. Ready for the magic to wake me up early and to kiss this season goodbye.