The things that get overlooked in the budding and blooming of spring are the death and compost of winter that helps to feed the new cycle. I am at the end of a cycle, stepping in to a new phase.
I am leaving behind mothering little kids and moving on to mothering teenagers. I’m leaving behind being a child and caregiving a sick parent. I am leaving the high strung energy of a hunting dog and an overworked mother, trying to do it at all. I have a wisdom I can’t ignore; an intuition I can’t deny.
There is becoming an adult, becoming a mother, becoming an orphan, and becoming a grandmother. It’s all energy I feel and can’t ignore. Change has cycled through.
There is no longer a backlog. This knowledge, this evolution, can’t be taken away from me. I am a strong, intelligent, hopeful being so happy to be here right now. I trust what is to come and my ability to handle it.
I must lay to rest the associations that no longer are thriving. I must let go of the past and make peace with the endings. In some cases, this includes my inability to be successful within some spaces. I also must remember what I was able to craft and achieve, what I was able to create.
I am remembering my humanity, the energy I give to others, and what I can do to once again show up in my life.